(For reference, I'm only 23 so this shit didn't happen that long ago.) There is no one definition of virginity, so what happens when you “lose” yours depends on a lot of different factors. I could tell that he cared about me and cared that I was enjoying myself too. And growing up Christian may have influenced that too... Is it normal to feel like you actually lost something? I would like a up date for dr simon ngui? I'm not saying you were militant about it or that you were trying to wait until marriage, but you obviously bought into some of that and those ideas can be really hard to escape- and they're hurting you. I had a talk with some of my other catholic school friends - I moved on to liberal areas (and have liberal parents who work in healthcare) so while I've never had issues feeling bad about having sex with people I genuinely like, I know some of them have told me they do. If you can't control your mood swings, I would consider birth control. Girlfriend upset I haven't asked her to marry me.? They said you should make sure you're fully compatible before a big commitment like marriage, and to do that you had to experience those things. It gives you that connection to the guy you had sex with. I highly suggest you read The Purity Myth: How America's Obsession With Virginity Is Hurting Young Women by Jessica Valenti. I'm 21 and lost my virginity last night to my serious boyfriend. Maybe have a new fantasy..? I finally was like, "well fuck it if He was out there He wouldn't have made me so horny I could just squeeze my thighs together to get an orgasm and then tell me to never fuck anything" so I seduced my ex and got my virginity out of the way. If I ever felt sadness, it was because I felt virtually unchanged by the whole experience. I lost my virginity to him last Friday, it was great and we both enjoyed it a lot. As for him he is acting this way because he seems to regret having sex with you and he cannot cope with this. I did, because I found the sex disappointing. I was, because I realised I was actually growing up and I loved my childhood way too much. I wasn't someone to just casually sleep with someone. It'll wear off in time, just try to take your mind off it like writing a story or drawing, making love poems or whatever is your hobby (: I think its because you hold something in your mind and fantasize about it and get excited about it happening.. and that lasts for so long. As part of our commitment to that mission, the AskWomen subreddit is curated to promote respectful and on-topic discussions, and not serve as a debate subreddit. Pour autoriser Verizon Media et nos partenaires à traiter vos données personnelles, sélectionnez 'J'accepte' ou 'Gérer les paramètres' pour obtenir plus d’informations et pour gérer vos choix. If there is someone you can talk to about this who will be supportive maybe it'll make you feel better. Yahoo fait partie de Verizon Media. I was also horny all the time and was just waiting for a way to figure out how to sex something without God hating me. Because you don't know how to feel after losing your virginity. He's been getting on my nerves a lot lately, he takes longer to text back(but he drops his phone a lot so its prob. ? Maybe. How common is it for a couple to be the same height and age as each other? I had always considered sex as a taboo. At the same time, I wasn't just going to lose it for the sake of losing it because it's an important thing to me. Cause I did something that was really intimate and never done before. Though my parents never fed me any of that kind of shit/we're as sex positive as they could be with a teen who didn't want to talk to their parents about sex and I thank the universe every day that I escaped those years without buying into that stuff. I wasn't someone to just casually sleep with someone. That thing you’ve been holding onto for years, some glorify you for your virginity and others shame you for still being a virgin, but at last it’s all irrelevant because you went all the way! Is it because I lost my virginity which is a really big thing in life? Sex - the physical and emotional - should be a positive experience. I felt like I grew up a little too fast in that aspect of my life. Having sex when you feel ready is as positive a thing as not having sex when you don't feel ready. It was something that had to stay miles away from my mind which was supposed to stay pure, just like my body. What’s better being on the pill or condoms? yep virginity is (highly) overrated and you're feeling all mixed up, was it anything like you expected it to be? I'm curious as to why you feel sad. I was pleased that I would always be able to look back on it as a happy experience. This comment has been removed for using gendered slurs. In the end I was happy that I had given my virginity to someone I cared about and had a positive experience. Did you do it in your butt also? AskWomen: A subreddit dedicated to asking women questions about their thoughts, lives, and experiences; providing a place where all women can comfortably and candidly share their responses in a non-judgmental space. I remember feeling liberated when I had sex for the first time- glad to do away with a label that I felt like people were putting so much unnecessary importance on. I also grew up in a Christian household, so I understand that. Placing importance on it only sets people up to feel less than for engaging in something perfectly normal and healthy and natural. It was a part of "me," my "identity." Liberating. The fact that you have self-respect, waited until you felt ready and waited for the right person is what makes you special and that's not going to just go away anytime soon. I was sad because it wasn't everything I had hoped it would be. 11 /11 Does the first time hurt? I definitely felt proud in high school that I never gave up my virginity, because I had been taught that kids probably weren't mature enough to have a sexual relationship and it really wasn't a good idea. When he first went in it obviously hurt, but he slowed down and made sure I was ready to continue and checked in a few times during to ensure I was okay and that I didn't want to stop. You can sign in to give your opinion on the answer. (: I think it's natural. I was 20 when I lost my virginity. My boyfriend and I have been together since June 14th, 2010.. so a little over 2 years, we live an hour apart, but see each other often and he's moving closer to me in October. These speakers would talk about how we should pity women who felt the need to engage in sex and how holding onto our purity was really something to be proud of.